Pavlov's Room 101 Dalmatians

I thought my patented Dog Annoyer™ was pretty harsh, but the fellow in this video takes Dog Annoying out of this world (at least, I think that's what he's trying to do). Anyway, he makes me look like Gandhi pleading with Genghis Khan.

Not suitable for viewing by younger puppies.

And if anyone heeds me: I DON'T approve of kicking any animals*, and if you watch the video carefully you'll see that no animal was harmed. Please be gentle with little me.

*Unless in self-defence, of course, although I understand that a better defence against large dogs is to yank their tail playfully, as they are conditioned to interpret this as 'cheekiness' on your part, and will merely lick you. Which reminds** me...

**...This is a common scenario of summer for me. I go and sit in the park, pondering what malevolant maladvice I can write next, or even reading a book. Then a huge domesticated wolf jumps on me, followed by a bloke who is swishing the air with a wolf lead, as though to tell the world 'Look how safe my dog is! Look at him go, doesn't even need to be connected to the end of this lead!' The hound then starts to eat my face, like those rats in Room 101. Then the dog owner comes nearer and I see it is Richard Burton. And Burton says 'Winston, imagine a dog licking a human face forever', or alternately 'Ha ha ha, she'll only lick you to death!' and as I frantically try to pull the animal's tail I scream back 'I know, that's exactly what's in my Room 101'. Then I wake up and I am still a teacher.

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